What should I do with my wedding ring after divorce, or during the divorce? This question can touch on the financial, emotional, and logistical aspects of divorce or legal separation.
This question of what to do with the wedding ring during, and after divorce is so awkward that many couples avoid the subject entirely. However, avoiding this topic can add to the pool of resentment between you and your spouse.
When to Stop Wearing the Wedding Ring in Divorce
If the decision to divorce is mutual, and you are on a friendly basis, there is probably no need to discuss the timing of when you stop wearing your ring(s). However, a truly “mutual” divorce is rare.
At the end of most marriages, one spouse may not want, refuses to talk about, or is in denial about the divorce. In this case, a conversation about when to stop wearing the wedding rings is especially challenging and helpful. Ideally, you can agree upon date when you will each stop wearing your wedding rings. Your spouse may claims they don’t care. Yet, they will definitely notice. Thus, I suggest you inform them of when you plan to stop wearing the ring.
Divorce Ring Ideas
During a divorce, each person’s jewelry is usually considered their own personal belongings, much like clothing. The exception is if you heavily invested in jewelry during the marriage. If either of you has a valuable jewelry collection, it might be professionally valued like other asset collections (art, coins, guns, etc.).
The divorce wedding rings differ from other jewelry in a few ways:
- It is often the most expensive piece in a jewelry collection.
- It can have significant sentiment and meaning as a symbol of the marriage.
- It may have been presented as a gift from one spouse to the other.
- Often, neither person wants to keep or wants their spouse to keep the rings.
Who Gets the Wedding Ring in a Divorce?
The answer may depend on many factors. If viewed from a legal perspective, it might be different, depending on the state. For a divorce or legal separation in the State of Oregon, the rings are tyically categorized as “gifts,” which are considered the separate property of the receiver of the gift.
If you live in a different state, or are unclear how you feel about it, consider these questions: Was the wedding ring was purchased in the spirit of a gift or as discussed as a mutual investment? Did you shop for, and purchase the wedding ring together?
How valuable is the ring, in comparison to your other assets? If you the ring is one of the most valuable assets that either of you own, you may propose to your ex-spouse to share the sales proceeds in some way.
How do you Sell your Wedding Ring After Divorce?
Due to the emotional and financial complications of wedding rings, a decision to sell the ring(s) is a common solution. Unfortunately, people usually receive only 10-35% of the initial cost when they are selling a wedding ring. The best approach is to sell it to a jeweler who you highly trust, somebody you or your family members have worked with over time.
The 2nd best approach tor selling your wedding ring is to work with an online auction house that specializes in selling wedding rings. Whomever you use to sell your ring, make sure it is an established and reputable company (BBB accredited / good online reviews) that keeps your ring secure throughout the process.
You might decide the low resale value isn’t worth getting rid of your wedding ring. However, what is the ring worth when it is gathering dust at the bottom of your jewelry box?
Family Significance: Gift or Repurpose your Wedding Ring
Due to low resale value, many people choose to gift the ring to their child or another relative.
What if the ring was passed down from your family ancestor? While this complicates the question of the wedding ring on the surface, it can also simplify matters. In these cases, the wedding ring is then held for one of your children, or a younger family member who will oneday be getting married.
When only part of the ring is a family heirloom, you can separate and keep that part, and sell the part of the wedding ring that was purchased for the marriage. You can re-purpose the precious stones or metals you from your wedding ring into creating a necklace, earrings, or other piece of jewelry.
Discuss the Ring as Part of the Divorce
This article provides several considerations around what to do with a wedding ring after divorce, however, based on the circumstances surrounding the acquisition of the rings, the marriage, and the divorce, you may have a unique way of your own to deal with your wedding ring.
What is most important is to think about and discuss with your spouse the plan for the ring(s) as part of your divorce process. Having these frank and direct discussions about emotionally charged issues is one of the many benefits of divorce mediation.
Ultimately, whether you decide to keep, repurpose, sell, or gift your wedding ring to a relative, resolving the ring question can provide an important extra layer of emotional closure.